© Written and Edited - June 2nd, 2017 - 6:12 pm to 6:27 pm
Edited - June 2nd, 2017 - 9:41 pm to 9:47 pm
Edited - June 3rd, 2017 - 10:09 am to 10:24 am
They're swearing in and I'm swearing
When I attended the swearing in of the GTRC at the depot on Washington Street, (I think on June 12th, 2004) it was one of many blessed experiences. And I was aware of what was happening in some ways but it was also surreal. I just followed people like my mother. I don't think I knew what to expect, but I might have had a general idea. At one point, I was herded with other Survivors to sit on the side. Someone said, this section is for survivors and maybe family members too.
I was aware that this was an incredible experience that some people don't have, the GTRC from beginning and throughout the process. And I had mixed feelings. I felt incredibly lucky to be there at all. I knew my view and experience was going to be somewhat off-putting. And I think I had a brief thought that I could say that I wanted to sit over there, pointing to
the best area I could at the time to face the commissioners and others doing the swearing in ceremony.
But since my view of the swearing in was on the side I had a more limited perspective. And I think that the degree of my feelings might have been magnified by another momentus occasion in which I didn't have a good view of my sister's wedding ceremony. But that was partially on me because I was one of the ushers.
My best perspective would have been to see them in front of me, both for the swearing in and my healing journey in general.
So, I know that there's a really big picture with a lot of perspectives and people involved. But to be honest with my feelings, I have to speak my Truth as I see it.
And I imagine that a lot of work went into planning and carrying out the swearing in. So, in the really big picture, considering alot of things, I'm ok. And maybe and hopefully my sharing these thoughts will not only help me but others can gain insight that can benefit their journeys too.